Have you ever heard people say, “Back in the good old days”? Why do you think that is? For a reason unknown, people dwell on the past as if their best days are behind them. Can you honestly say that you wouldn’t go back if you had the chance?

How much time do we spend wishing things were the way they used to be? I used to think if I had the chance, that I’d go back and fix things; to reshape my life. Not anymore. Why not live for the chance to define yourself in the present and throw the old you away. Take pride in the change. Things aren’t how they were, and we can’t do anything about it.

Rob Bell says it better than I could hope to. He says, “When we’re still holding on to how things were, our arms aren’t free to embrace today.”

Here’s my challenge: Live for Today, not for the remembrance of yesterday.

Time never seems to go at the pace we want it to does it? It’s always a disappointment when what you want isn’t what God wants of you. Maybe disappointment isn’t the right word. For the most part, I can hear God talking to me, telling me what he wants of me but for some reason I don’t really like to listen. Usually, it doesn’t turn out too well. I end up hearing him through the consequences of my actions. Isn’t funny how it all works out?

I recently discovered that working on my own agenda isn’t the best way to go. Not that anything bad happened, but it just didn’t quite work out the way I had hoped. I began to really push something, and not that it is a bad thing, but it’s just not the right time. Patience just is not one of my virtues.

I guess the only thing I can do is wait to see if I gain any. Funny how that works out, huh?

More times than not, I find myself in a state of confusion and discontent. And for some reason, it’s a bit comforting. I usually just turn on some mellow music and let my thoughts take me away. The majority of the time I end up focusing on the little things, which distract me from my main focus in life: God.

I’ve really been trying to set my sights on what I know is right, yet as we all know it’s so easy to allow yourself to grow accustom to what the world wants of you. Even while in the comfort of my closest friendships, those of which are said to be rooted in the seed of God himself, I can find myself being pulled away from him. The many temptations of this world are so often appealing to my eyes, which brings a sadness to my heart. Am I supposed to feel guilty about mere thoughts? I know it is said to be of the human “nature”, but is that not just an excuse to try and make you feel better about what you do?

Lately, I’ve been deeply pursuing a more meaningful relationship with God, and as I do, I see myself making many strides towards a more honorable life, yet I can still see myself slipping away into a life of meaninglessness. I truly believe that God is calling me into a life of servitude; whether it’s on a volunteer basis or as a profession, I do not know. The biggest thing is that I need to let him take the reigns of my life and trust that what his judgment is absolute. Yet, why do I continue to question what I know he wants? Is that yet again my very human characteristic, and everyone’s at that, at its peak?

I’m never too sure why I think the way I do. Recently, I found myself being called away from a certain relationship that I will allow to remain anonymous. I felt like God was calling me in a different direction for my life; a direction whose prerequisite for me was to be away from that person. So, as I proceeded to end things with that person, I found myself truly believing that this was my calling. I felt adamantly that the decision I made was honoring to God and that I was at a point where there should be no questions asked. Yet, once again I found myself questioning my actions.

I wish there was an easy way to get ones feelings out, but with every word I type I can feel myself getting more and more anxious; for no logical reason at all. I find myself being very drained and deprived of the necessities of life: fellowship, alone time with God, and maybe just a few moments to just get away. I know I’m just a kid, and that it’ll only get worse but life is really robbing me of what I thought was supposed to be the good years in my life. It may be just a question of my youth, and along with that youth: immaturity. But I know that God has a plan for me.

I will leave you with the hope that even through all that may be questioned, that you find your place in life through him who strengthens you and that through that, you might live a life that resonates God’s love…

Hi all! This is my first post here in the students site, and I’m excited to be here and to be a part of this. I may re-post some excerpts from my other blog so you’re all updated on what’s going on. I’ll be sure to keep everyone updated and clued in. Thanks,

-Dustin